The Night Before
by Mushraluvr
Summary: It’s been nearly a month since his reappearance. Dagger awakens one night to contemplate her own mind. She and Zidane have a lot in store for the future, but sweet moments like this are precious and treasured.


**I happened to have a random idea pop in my head and this was one of those times that I wouldn't be able to write anything else properly until I finished it. It was all just a jumble of fluff I wanted to write for my story, ****Itsu Made Mo**** or even ****The Light of Shinzo****. For both of them, I'm so far behind already with writing that I didn't want to write something that would either be omitted or changed drastically later on.**

**The idea sort of stopped halfway through in my mind, but as I wrote it out for FFIX, it grew more and became this. I'm happy with it, being a short one shot. And I'm also glad it adds to the tiny number of FFIX fanfiction there is out there. So please read, enjoy, and review.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything in Final Fantasy and that includes IX. Heck, I don't even **_**want**_** to own IX. The only person I've met who could actually make it better is ****CrimsonCobwebs**. **Don't believe me? Read her ****Brick by Brick**** and its sequel, ****Foundations****. This girl can **_**write.**_

The Night Before

My eyes snapped open in the silent room. For a moment, I couldn't recognize my own sleeping chambers; the soothing darkness from moments before seemed more comfortable and recognizable than my own home. I was vaguely aware of the sliver of a moon shining dully behind grey clouds high outside my window. The faint light revealed the furniture of my room with a dull tint, only my crown and mirror on my dresser were able to catch its light.

I lay still for a while, just breathing and enjoying the comfortable lull in my mind. This was my favorite time of night sometimes, when my mind was empty and soothing, letting me just be. I had no worries or dark feelings to creep up on me and stir my mind into turmoil. Sometimes I would wonder how I ran matters from day to day. I could never recall consciously making decisions during those times, but I know I did; and from the results, they were decisions made by a great queen for her people. It's as if a robotic part of my mind, a part of Garnet, took control of my thoughts and allowed me to drift from day to day with as little emotional and mental strain as possible.

Oddly enough, when thinking about it, my mind didn't shift from its wonderful neutral state of emotion. Ever since returning home, a part of me, or maybe all of me - both Dagger and Garnet, had been painfully hollow. The first few weeks were probably the worst. I would sit in my room whenever I had free time and stare out the window, waiting for him: a theater ship, a mysterious letter from a moogle followed by his casual entrance, a chocobo's call, or even him going to such lengths as to appear at my window so high up from the courtyard. Anything to announce "I'm back!" would have done, but the longer I waited, the more dream-like it seemed to be. It felt so unreal that I would have to feel like that forever, alone and empty but still expected to watch over my Queendom.

I don't know when, but I finally resolved that I would never see him again, that I would drift through the rest of my life, doing what was expected of me until I could put this part of me away so I could rule fairly; like when I put Garnet away in the beginning of that long journey that seemed so long ago. Though, that was different, and turned out to have an unexpected positive effect. I had tried so hard to not only hide my identity, but to try this new way of life that worked out so well for Zidane and the others. It was as if I put on an undecorated clay mask over the face of Garnet. It was still easy to see her behind the bland mask of Dagger, but along the way, my friends, my experiences, and my own efforts painted a beautiful kaleidoscope of colors that covered Garnet fantastically.

With a brief surge of happiness I remembered that the base of Garnet, the stubbornness, the knowledge of arts and drama, the authority, and the love for all people shone through. Dagger, the young woman who was braver, dirtier, and more defiant, mixed in with Garnet to make the person I am today. I am the girl and I am the mask, a fusion of the two that make me who I am. Of course I can't forget about the person who shaped my entire being, providing the body for the girl and the mask. I am Sara, a summoner of the fallen village of Madain Sari. Without her, this whole adventure would have never happened. A normal princess would have never gotten caught up in an Eidolon battle and mission to save the planet like I did. She is my heritage and my powers, no matter how foreign she still seems to me. I have to accept her because I am her.

The thought of heritage reminded me of my furry-tailed kidnapper, the one who dragged me into that entire mess. He had so badly wanted to know his own heritage, only to find that he was to destroy this world. With a shudder, I remembered his broken soul in Terra, how his eyes lost their shine and stared out at me with dull indifference. It was almost as bad as if he had died by his brother's power-crazed hands. Through that frightening trial, I learned just how fragile he could be under his mask of confidence and laughter. After that, I wanted to always see him smile, and be there for him when he wouldn't

I cut off at this thought, not sure where my thoughts were leading and once again enjoyed the refreshing silence of my mind. The thoughtless period didn't last as long as before when I started to think about the state of mind itself. I wondered for a moment how my earlier thoughts didn't seem to bother me in the least. My mind had stayed peaceful and soothing during all of the same thoughts that, earlier, would have caused me to lock myself in my room and cry into my steaming bathwater until it grew so cold that I imagined myself once again traversing the icy plains of the Lost Continent in pursuit of a madman. I would become so depressed that my health would send me back into my room to sleep the rest of the day away in miserable solitude.

No, my feelings stayed neutral, if not positive, and I was able to comfortably dig through the crevices of my mind that I had locked away for so long. Everything seemed so far away that for a moment I didn't even know if it was my mind I was running through or if I had intruded upon someone else's most secret moments and called them my own. Regardless, I was finally able to smile and feel again. I found what was missing and it was as if that piece magically awakened my entire being.

Suddenly, a wave of bubbly joy washed over me. It was light and feathery like the garuda feather pillow (I forbade anyone from using chocobo feathers for more than minor decorations) I lay my head on. A giggle escaped my lips and I covered my mouth quickly. I absently wondered where it had come from when I felt my sleeping partner shift beside me. I turned over in my bed to investigate, enjoying the cool touch of my silk sheets as they moved over my bare arms.

Zidane's eyes stirred beneath tan lids, the corner of his mouth twitched slightly and he sighed an unintelligible murmur. He moved slightly, but then settled back down and was still once more. I smiled, my heart fluttering against my chest as I lay there and studied his tranquil face. The years he was gone didn't change him as much as I would have thought. He still looked the same, thin and agile, but still well-toned. He had grown a few more inches, but other than that I couldn't see any major changes. I would often catch myself wondering if his face had changed somehow or if his back had grown broader, but I couldn't tell.

What I did notice was a new net-like design of scars all across his body. The newer ones, the ones from the Iifa Tree, stood out brighter than the others on his chest and shoulders. His arms had been covered in so many scars before, but I still caught myself spying one and wondering why I didn't see it before. Even now as I thought about it, I spied one running along his jaw line. It was thin and jagged: I imagined it was from the thorns of the evil vines, but tried not to think about it. Impulsively, my hand reached up and I rested my fingers over the smooth skin, lightly tracing the blemish from end to end.

I wished I had been there. I would have summoned Ifrit and used his Hellfire to burn that vile tree into a pile of black ashes. I would have cast as many Curas and Curagas and used all the potions in the world to make the pain he felt disappear. But I wasn't; but he was also okay. I'm grateful for that.

He stirred underneath my touch and I found myself looking into dark cyan eyes. They darted around for only a moment before resting on me. I could see a question in their blue depths as he studied my face, probably looking for any sign of distress.

"Dagger?" he spoke quietly, his voice gentle and a bit concerned. "What's wrong, Babes?" He shifted underneath the covers until his arm found my waist and tightened around me, his fingers gently stroking my back.

I met his eyes with a warm smile, trying to get the message of 'I love you' across with the simple gesture. "I'm fine," I admitted. My fingers stopped tracing the scar and I rested my hand on his cheek. "I woke up and I was just thinking." He pulled me closer and nuzzled the top of my head affectionately.

"Bout what?"

"Oh," I sighed playfully, "only about my favorite person in the world." I kissed his bare chest and snuggled closer.

The mood changed slightly and I felt the presence of Zidane's most common attitude; and I knew he was smirking. "Well, I'm sorry to keep you awake with how madly in love you are with me and how badly you wanna fu-" I pounded a fist into his chest with a loud thump and he stopped.

"Okay, okay. Sorry," he chuckled.

"You're terrible," I chided, rolling my eyes. He pulled away and moved lower so we were touching noses. His eyes stared into mine and my heart jumped, filling me with feathery happiness. His hand slid up my spine and rested on the back of my head, his fingers tangling into my dark hair.

"Yeah," he grinned, "but you know you still love me." His lips met mine for a moment with a swift motion. My own lips curved upward into a small grin.

"I know I do, for both of our sakes," I replied, playful and tender.

His lips found mine once more and I returned it gratefully. I just wanted to be close and love him always. His body shifted closer to me as he deepened the kiss, our lips locked together and moving against and with each other simultaneously. His furry limb snaked around and under my nightgown and coiled around my thigh, rough and warm against my bare skin. At the same time, his tongue pressed against my lips. I let them part and he darted in, his hot breath flowing in as he did. My head felt dizzy with the warmth of his tail, hands, and lips. A sense of completeness buzzed inside of me along with my love for him. Our tongues danced together in a sloppy, pleasurable tango until we finally parted.

His eyes regarded me with adoring gratitude and he swooped in for a quick peck on my forehead. I didn't know exactly what I wanted to say or do to express my thoughts so I just said the simplest one that came to mind: "I love you," spoken so surely and strongly that no one dare doubt it's truth.

"I love you, too," he replied, whispering it in my ear, "and I want to be with you always."

"And you shall." I thought back to how all the nobles and higher ups had thrown a fit when they realized my intentions, but I didn't care. Dagger shone through, giving me the strength to tell those pompous aristocrats the equivalent of Zidane's "fuck off". It certainly had the same effect.

I had spent so much time worrying how Zidane and I would be together despite his 'status' when Eiko paid me a visit. Of course, being the child she is, she opened up a conversation over tea with an excited, "So can I be the flower girl?" and proceeded to start asking about themes, guests, and how the dresses would look. I explained the whole predicament to her and upon finishing she glared up at me and declared in her vociferous voice, "That's the stupidest excuse I ever heard!"

I tried to make her understand, but she ended up making me see the reason. She told me that I was, in fact, the Queen of Alexandria. That meant that, advisors or not, I ruled Alexandria, not the nobles. I could take their wealth and power away in an instant, but they couldn't touch me. She reminded me that it was a previous ruler who had started the whole royalty marries nobility 'rule' in the first place and that meant that I could just as easily put an end to. It didn't matter what the nobles thought, I was the Queen and my word was law. This is exactly what I told them, too. Zidane and even Steiner were both proud of me for telling them off.

I was just glad that there was no longer anything to keep him away from me.

"Yes, your Majesty," he chuckled. He laid his head back on his pillow and grinned, showing off his straight teeth. I scoffed, shaking my head in amusement.

Scooting closer and resting my head on his chest I asked, "So where are we going afterwards? You still haven't told me."

He absently played with my hair as he answered, "You'll see. I've made sure everything was set up. It's a surprise." A tired yawn escaped my lips but I was still curious.

"I can't imagine what would really be a surprise. We've been everywhere, Zidane."

"You'll see," he said. "Just be sure to pack a change of boots and travelling clothes. I wouldn't want you to ruin your dress. Beatrix would never let me hear the end of it."

I laughed at the thought. "When have I not?"

"I know, I know," he sighed. "Just making sure you don't forget with everything else going on."

"Thanks." I hugged him close to me, moving my head to kiss his neck.

"Anything for you," he replied with a deep tenderness. "Now get some sleep. We've got a big day tomorrow."

"Okay," I nodded. "Good night."

"Night." His arm moved back down and rested around my waist, and his tail uncurled from around my leg, taking it's warmth with it. I shifted a bit, making sure I wasn't laying on anything in a way that would leave it tingling and sore in the morning. I closed my eyes and listened to his breathing as it slowed and the steady, reassuring beat of his heart against his chest.

As I started to drift off to the comforting shadows of my dreams, I couldn't help but wonder why I had awoken in the first place. Nothing had been wrong, no intruders or loud noises to bother me and as I recall, I was having a wonderful dream.

I was walking down the aisle, the faces of my friends blending together in happy smiles and teary eyes in the side of my vision. Eiko had already skipped ahead, tossing beautiful pink and red rose petals high into the air. Uncle Cid led me across the red carpeted march with our arms linked, leading me to my Zidane who stood at the altar. He looked up as we entered the room, his face lighting up when our eyes met. His tail bristled out in surprise and began to sway slowly back in forth to the music as he tried to stay still. His attire hadn't changed all that much; it looked as if he had just found a much neater version of his usual clothes. He looked so different without his dagger belt and thief gloves. It looked as if the hairstylist had managed to tame his unruly hair and neatly tied it back at his neck. It was the same style, but it looked entirely different washed and combed neatly. I had made it to the altar, and let him take my hand, and then I woke up.

I decided that it was just pre-wedding nerves that had wakened me. After all, tomorrow all of Alexandria would have to welcome their new king, Zidane Tribal: the peasant, the thief, the actor, the Angel of Death, the savior of Gaia, but most importantly, the love of my life.


End file.
